I mean… I like it. President Gorilla. He's a Gorilla, but he's also the President. You know? That's the hook. We think it kinda sets him apart from other Gorillas. Unfortunately, the other two offerings - Songs of Sorcelation: Return of The Returner and WHEEL SAINT - are probably gonna win, and even more unfortunately-er for the longsuffering and bedraggled Sorcelator enthusiast, I think Wheel Saint is one of the coolest things we've ever done. But we'll give you an opportunity to choose (wheel saint) later this week.

Wheel Saint is a new idea with some old roots. One of the first comic book characters I ever created was a teenager named Sam who had an Angel imprisoned in him. I apologize but I was 16 or 17 when I cooked this up. 

As we have suggested many times, Catholicism is a legendary intellectual property in need of a good steward. I've only seen the first three Prophecy movies, but there's some neat shit in there. I guess technically Da Vinci Code uses the IP but in more of a fan fiction way. Allow us to throw our hat into the ring, except in this instance, the "hat" is actually a halo. Welcome to WHEEL SAINT.

wheel Saint! pic.twitter.com/hPttjv1iVH

— Gabe (@cwgabriel) May 5, 2023

Just as in the days of old, we're gonna put a couple pitches in front of you. Historically, this has resulted in some hot shit. Today's is a return to those Sorcelations which have historically been so prized. Friday's is yet to come, but it's worth noting as a preview perhaps that Gabriel and I consider Catholicism to be a criminally underutilized IP.

It seemed like there might be value in containing our meta-conversation stripwise. I'm not entirely convinced that this is an internationally recognized form of well - I don't think IEEE has established a framework around this.

I keep forgetting about the digital portion of The Olympics, but you can't really blame me - it's super, super weird. The Gran Turismo is the most elaborate and simmy of the bunch, which offers something like a competitive framework, but some of these are also, like, apps on your phone. Also, the site is inscribed with incredibly strange language. I don't think we're using cheugy anymore but it's pretty fuckin' cheug'd.

I don't use Twitter like Gorb or Brenna do. I follow 31 people, so scrolling to the top of The Entire Service for me is a very straightforward proposition. And when I'm using the app, I don't have any idea what's trending or what I should be mad at. Gorb and Brenna "play" Twitter like a videogame. They play block-a-mole. They report a motherfucker. They go to people's personal feeds and have their biases confirmed. And when they completely bore out a keyword, they go find another keyword. If Twitter had a foil lid, like a yogurt cup, they would lick the inside of it. My usage pattern having been thus established, and then compared, I have to wonder if I'm a "Twitter user" at all.

A couple years ago I realized that hearing a bird made me happy. That probably seems dumb, but my cognition doesn't work like it should and so it can take me a super long time to arrive at perfectly obvious conclusions. Just as an example: it took me about twenty five years to figure out somebody had clearly come to my house with romantic intentions. A couple weeks ago I was kinda like, "Oh. She probably wasn't super interested in the Amiga." But I was super interested in the Amiga. Too interested? It's hard to say. Given the alternative, it's worth considering.

On the flight to PAX East 2020 I watched the movie Ford vs. Ferrari and learned about the 24 hours of Le Mans. This started me on a path that resulted in years of sim racing. In the long run it proved to be a very expensive movie rental.

When you get these kinds of notices, about how your web no gonna worky, it reminds me of a couple specific things.

While digging through a closet I found an old Sony camcorder and a tape labeled “E3 2000”. It took some doing, but I managed to get the video onto my computer and now it’s on our YouTube for all to enjoy!

I used to play Minecraft Dungeons with my youngest daughter Ronia, who is known as "The Chu." If there were any questions about her parentage, her need to craft elaborate names for her favorite weapons probably would have cleared them up. The main thing it indicated to me was that - after Dungeons and arguably Minecraft: Story Mode - there's all kindsa headroom in Minecraft, and it doesn't have to feel mercenary.

Although my companion has the proven capacity to influence, because he essentially lives inside Gran Turismo 7 VR, I think the ergonomic aspects of the experience began to wear on his creaking skeleton - ravaged as it is by age. Maybe there simply wasn't time to grovel; it's also possible that his gaunt and ill-used frame can no longer assume the shameful positions commonly used in groveling and he resorted to the scoundrel's last redoubt - capitalism.

It's true enough that Grand Admiral Thrawn manifested in the cartoons, but the skip to live action - and eventually feature film - represents another vindication of the Expanded Universe. We made comic about it at the time, with a gentle and frankly honorable concession that not everything in the EU needed to be ascended into a new canon. But if you're familiar with the works, you're seeing the old stuff manifest ways that are just… worse. The main reason they haven't just utilized the profound resource they had in Mara Jade is because Filoni is too busy jacking off to his OCs.

Because I have the correct opinions and the right thoughts, I was under the impression that I needed to guard myself constantly against the scourge of nostalgia - the past as a drug, a place that never existed. Except I know perfectly well that it was better. I pay the health care bills for more than thirty people, and that hasn't gotten better.  I've taken a flight.  I used to be able get my children's medicine on time.  Who, precisely, does this abjuration of nostalgia serve? Well, it serves capital. It serves the forces stripmining our society. It's vitally important that we not remember. And so "good people" tell themselves holographically complex lies, because they're so good that being robbed joyfully is core to their identity.

I sorta thought the fight was going to be somewhere between PGA Tour 2K23 and EA's Incredibly Long Name Game, but it's not - it's between PGA Tour 2K21 and nothing. I literally returned 2K23. Golf is a very simple game, actually, so when it comes to making it "gamey" it's really just a matter of how you want to ruin it. PGA Tour 2K21 ruined it the least, and because it had an industry leading course creator and attracted community talent that rivals the included courses, you don't have to buy anything from either vendor ever again.