Let’s pretend for a moment that I was sick and tired of trying to create works of art that were funny or interesting. Instead I decided to become a worthless political cartoonist, scrawling my work on the backs of paper dinosaurs and eagerly anticipating the next tragedy so that I could draw a picture of a bald eagle crying on a torn American flag. If that’s what I decided to do, then my first cartoon might be a drawing of a mouse trap which I would label “Star Wars Galaxies”. Inside the mouse trap I would draw a piece of cheese and I would label it “The Jump to Light Speed expansion”. Then off to the side I would draw an octopus that would represent America’s foreign policy pre 9-11.

I was just telling Gabriel that this strip would be an excellent opportunity to use the word "urethra," and I was dead right. Many of the strips in the Penny Arcade canon did, in their original iterations, include some reference to this private canal which was subsequently redacted by my cohort.

We’ve fixed the problem with the PAX pre-registration system that kept you Canadians from signing up. We have also updated the PAX web site with more special guests so go take a look. You will see that we’ve added Optimus Rhyme to the list of musical guests. I think it’s safe to say that come Saturday night, the joint will be jumping.

I had a really good time at Sakuracon this year. Thanks to everyone that stopped by the booth to say hello. We had requested a booth next to Sweet Kitty again this year and I can tell you it was the right decision. We were exposed to a parade of new and delicious Japanese candy products each day. I want you all to call in sick one day this week, drive out to Kent and visit the Sweet Kitty store. They have candy there that will blow your fucking mind!

"Monday's comic might be kind of mean, Fred - I'm just letting you know," I said. He laughed and told me that was fine. He hadn't seen it, though.

I'm at the con goofing around on a borrowed laptop, and I saw some things that might interest you.

The same World of Warcraft update that bolted on the tyrannical Rest System also did something else, namely, add all the Horde races as playable characters. It also added the Druid class, available to Night Elves and Tauren, which is exceedingly fresh and allows transformation into bears, cats, and some kind of fucked up looking seal thing. Anyway, that's not the point. The point is that the new Undead race broaches etiquette questions that can literally pierce the mind.

I'll let you know when it's ready for spam and hostile scripts again.

Page nine of our sixteen page Splinter Cell:PT comic book is now online. Please check it out, but keep in mind that I determine my own self worth based on your opinion of the things I create.

A reader sent me this image, which I found amusing.

Rohaq let me know about a thread on the Game On forum where people were putting their Gamertags in an effort to promote jackhole free play. Seemed worth posting.

One last time to make sure I didn't screw anything up - we'll be at this weekend's SakuraCon event. We'll be kicking it in the dealer room when we aren't at this or that panel.

A number of people asked me if we would produce the shirt seen in this strip for purchase, and I'd love to, but somebody else already did. That's one of Kiko's shirts, from over at Gameskins.

I just finished reading the latest issue of Official Playstation Magazine. I picked it up because it had a picture of one of the bad guys from Killzone on the cover along with the promise of an "exclusive first look". Sony is doing a really nice job of keeping this title very mysterious. We really haven't heard much about Killzone and maybe that's why I'm so interested in it.

Frankly, we're worried about the Live assholes, but we're confident they'll find some way to make people's lives miserable wherever they go.

I didn't expect any screenshots to accompany it, but here they are - they've announced Battlefield 2. In and of itself, that's not a shock - but in addition to improved graphics, how about a commander mode where you can issue orders to teammates? What say you to maps that support over a hundred people, maps that expand or retract to provide an optimal environment? That's not all, go check the article at 1up for more.